iPope 1.0 released

Actual News Item:

SYDNEY (Reuters) - Pope Benedict will text message thousands of young Catholics on their mobile phones during World Youth Day in Sydney in July, hoping going digital will help him connect better with a younger audience.

Even though I'm not Catholic, I think it's great that the Pontiff is adapting to 21st century technology. Since Joseph Ratzinger became Benedict XVI, many spiritually progressive types have been hoping that he would embrace a historic opportunity for the church to finally get with the times, modernize, shake off the dust, roll some bones, and pry open some of those old dungeon doors. Well according to the Reuters article, that seems to be exactly what's happening, and I can only guess that an IM from His Holiness might look something like this:

OMG HEY PPL, IZ ME DA BIG GUY. SRY CANT C/U FTF, BUT GR8 2T2Y ANYHOO. U KNO MY A/S/L ATM? IM PRKED RITE OUTSIDE YR HOUSE IN THE POPE M/B!!!!! HAHA J/K, BUT I GOT A MSG 4U FR JESUS - DONT BE A H8R, LOL! B SURE 2 GIVE LOTS OF H&K TO YR GF/BF, BUT ALWAYS DTRT, THAT MEANS NO 420, PRON, OR SEX 4SURE!! HTG!! NOT JUS CUZ YPAW, BUT GIW TOO! SO IF YR NIFOC RITE NOW, PYPO & QUIT IT, DUDE!! ROFLMAO!! OK, I G2G, BUT THATS MY .02 AND UR AIMP. CIAO & TTYL, RATZ

If Pope Benedict is able to get some props from teens as a result of this approach, I hope he will use his newfound street cred to go after Christian Rock, which is an oxymoron if ever there was one. When Jesus returns, I personally think He might be a big fan of Pearl Jam.