"Madame, bear in mind That princes govern all things--save the wind." -Victor Hugo, The Infanta's Rose

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Brother can you spare some change?

Welcome to the first Wind In The Wire blog post of 2008! Yes, I've been slacking off lately but I decided that I simply must get off my lazy ass and write something, anything -- mainly so I wouldn't have to continue to look at those two butt-ugly corn-bag-throwin' redneck dudes from the video in my last post at the top of my page. It was starting to get embarrassing.

But I hope everyone had a great holiday. I'm writing this on the eve of the New Hampshire primary election, and by the time you read this the citizens of The Granite State will have spoken, and having decided the fate of the nation and perhaps much of the world by their vote, will have gone back into hibernation until 2012. I was born and raised in New England myself, and yes, it gets that freaking cold up there in January. Perhaps it's the frigid weather, or the fact that the race for the 2008 White House has been going on since, oh, mid-2002, and now that the new year has arrived, has reached a full-blown fever pitch. In any case, the mood in New Hampshire, according to respected serious political journalist Dave Barry, can be currently defined in one word: "testy". He says:
This was clear during the big televised two-party debate sponsored by ABC News, Facebook, Mountain Dew, MySpace, eBay, Viagra, Microsoft and the Select Number Sleep Comfort Bed. The debate, moderated by avuncular newsman Charlie Gibson, was the pivotal moment of the New Hampshire campaign, and across the nation more than 20 million interested American households tuned in to the NFL playoffs, which were going on at the same time.

But those who watched the debates saw history in the making, as it became clear, over the course of the evening, that one person, and one person only, embodies the wisdom, the judgment, the maturity and -- yes -- the simple humanity that this nation desperately needs in its next president: Charlie Gibson.

Unfortunately he can't afford the pay cut. This means we're stuck with the actual candidates, who, as I say, are in a testy mood, as was evidenced in the Republican debate when John McCain and Mike Huckabee, during a particularly testy exchange over illegal immigration, gave Mitt Romney a wedgie. The Democrats, meanwhile, continued their ongoing obsessive argument about change -- who is the most for change; who has done the most changing; who can change with the changing times to bring change to those who need a change; who has taken the time, with all this tromping around New Hampshire night and day demanding change, to change their underwear; etc.
I haven't commented much on the election in this space so far, despite my unabashedly liberal bent ... probably because I'm having a hard time deciding who I like, or more precisely, who I despise the least. I think a lot of people find themselves in this position at the moment. Fortunately for that big amorphous blob of "undecided" voters like myself, there is no shortage of automated survey tools on the internet that will cheerfully spit out an ideal candidate based on your own positions on the various issues. I call these "Pres-O-Matics", and here are just a few of them:

http://www.wqad.com/Global/link.asp?L=259460

http://glassbooth.org/ (an especially good one)

http://www.selectsmart.com/president/2008.html (has some ads)

http://www.speakout.com/VoteMatch/senate2006.asp?quiz=2008

Finally, USA-Today's "Candidate Match Game" has neat graphics featuring pop-up candidate heads. If only the actual voting in November would be this much fun.

The problem I've found after trying several of these sites is that they each suggest a different candidate even though I input the exact same information about my preferences on the issues. One will say "Oh yeah, you like Hillary, all right", while another screams "Obama's your man", and still yet another says "If you were gay, you would totally do Dennis Kucinich." So I'm confused.*

It's damn lucky for me that I don't play the ponies; my talent for "picking a winner" -- as evidenced by my Fred Thompson prediction last year -- obviously sucks. Nevertheless, Obama seems to be surging, so I'll go out on a limb here and say I think he has the best chance to win in November. It will be interesting to see how it all goes; indeed, there will be no escaping it, unless one relocates here until 2009, which I am seriously considering. One thing we can say for certain: there will be change.

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*BTW: for the record, I am not gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

3 Comments:

  • At 1/08/2008 05:14:00 PM, Blogger SupaCoo said…

    I'm two-for-two for Kucinich. (Still have to check myself every time I try to spell that.)

     
  • At 1/09/2008 08:27:00 AM, Blogger Sphincter said…

    I wish McCain had given Romney a wedgie. He deserved it.

    I went with Kucinich. (Along with the 3 other people who did, too.)And I'm not gay either. But it would be OK if I was.

     
  • At 1/09/2008 09:03:00 AM, Blogger Mr. Toast said…

    I'm OK with Kucinich, except that every time I hear his name I think of a skin condition.

    "I've got Kucinich."

    "Oooh. You better put some lotion on that."

     

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