"Madame, bear in mind That princes govern all things--save the wind." -Victor Hugo, The Infanta's Rose

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Fusternut

...is my new Favorite Word. Thanks and a big shoutout to Moose for adding it to my meager lexicon. Before this, my prior favorite word was "asshat", an all-purpose word so totally cool that it even has its own official website. But, other than in reference to the current occupant of the White House, I haven't had much occasion to use it in casual conversation lately, so when "fusternut" came along I latched onto it like a pit bull to a pork chop.

The best part of "fusternut" is that it has no specific defined meaning, so you can use it pretty much any way you like. Here are but a few suggestions:

"You're such a silly fusternut!"
"Dammit, I better turn that little fusternut of information over to the proper authorities, toot sweet."
"Hey! Has anybody seen my fusternut?"

I encourage everyone to feel free to use it in whatever way seems appropriate to you.

In my opinion, however, the absolute best use of this word would be as a name for a candy bar. Frankly, I'm amazed that so far no corporate genius at Nestle or Hershey has seized on this, but I think it's just a matter of time. So even though I thought up this idea, Ms. Moose coined the word to begin with so I hereby publicly cede all rights and royalties that may result from such crass exploitation brilliant marketing to her. Hey, that's just the kind of swell fella I am. All I ask, Moose, is that after it becomes the top-selling candy bar in the world and you're rolling in the big bucks, swing your Lear Jet down to Texas some day and cook me up a nice big fat juicy steak.

And I'll have one of these for dessert.

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